How We See Ourselves

Date: October 6, 2010 at 8:05 am- by Ali- Comment(s): 4

I don’t post many photos on Facebook. But every now and then I’ll upload a batch, tag friends, comment accordingly, “like” things, etc.

Over the past few weeks I’ve attended the U.S. Open, gone home to New Hampshire to do some apple picking, spent a weekend on the beach in Connecticut and attending a wonderful wedding here in NYC. So it seemed only fitting that I share these experiences with the Facebook world.

Everyone has “that friend” in their group—the really effortlessly gorgeous one who looks great in every photo she takes. She never demands that she stand in the middle of the group to avoid the awkward “arm on hip” pose the end girls have to do, and she doesn’t have to put a whole lot of effort into getting ready because she’s got a stellar smile and naturally beach-wavy hair. Oh and you can’t hate her, because she’s nice and funny and lets you vent about…well, everything…all the time.

Anyway. I went to Connecticut a few weekends ago with a big group to celebrate this certain friend’s birthday. The weekend was perfect. Gorgeous weather, good food, and lots of tubing (yes, I flew off the tube, and yes, I was incredibly sore the next day). I posted a photo on Facebook that included the aforementioned friend in a bathing suit. Normally I’m pretty conservative about what I post—I don’t necessarily want people posting unflattering photos of me, so I keep the same in mind when posting pictures of other people. But I thought this photo was pretty awesome. My friend looked great and she was sporting six-pack abs, I swear. It was impressive.

So go figure when the first thing I notice yesterday is that within hours she had untagged this photo of herself. Not a big deal, but when I asked her about it the first thing she mentioned was her “FUPA” (Fatty Upper _____ Area) and her “hairy stomach.” What?!

I saw in this photo a gorgeous girl with no flaws (except for the fact that she lives in CT and not closer to me); she only saw what she hated about the photo. It made me think about how we really are our toughest critics. I’m guilty of it, too. But we all have to start being easier on ourselves!

I’m not sure if there’s much I can do to fix this whole “Body Dysmorphic Disorder” that seems to plague young women today. But if showering people with compliments helps at all, I’m ready to start dishing them out.

That’s my morning thought today. I challenge everyone to find a photo of yourself, whether it’s one you love or not, and pick out five things about yourself that you ADORE in the photo. Whether it’s your smile, your hair, your outfit or your energy, I’m sure you can find five things. If not, send me the photo. I’ll find 10 things for you.

Happy Wednesday, everyone!

Today: Banged out a 5-miler this morning, now it’s off to work, Spinning tonight then finally spending some time with my long lost boyfriend. Maybe I can convince him to get Thai food for dinner… Stay tuned. Have a great day!

4 Responses to "How We See Ourselves"

I’m still lost on what a FUPA is LOL. Never heard of it before…
But it’s sad she sees herself that way 🙁

She refers to her little belly pooch (that almost all women have!) as her FUPA. I don’t like the P-word, so I still won’t say it (hehe) but it’s a term for that little area above your “nether regions.”

Isn’t it so sad but so true that we are our worst critics? We really do just see the negative.

Ali, the way you feel about this photo (and I know the one you mean) is exactly how I feel about photos of YOU on Facebook. You always untag, and you look so pretty in them! My favorite’s are the pics from the wedding in New Hampshire (with wavy hair) and the ones from my mom’s wedding. You should really wear that dress again soon.